A “Four-way settlement conference” is when husband and wife and their respective attorneys meet at one of the attorneys’ offices to negotiate and attempt to settle the case. These meetings are often an excellent forum to settle a case.
Nothing can waste time and a client’s money like the two attorneys going back and forth and back and forth sending settlement letters and emails. If I send my opponent a detailed settlement letter, chances are that he will in turn mail it to his client for review. In a few days they will then talk, and at some point the attorney will draft a counter-proposal (which could take days depending on his schedule). He will then give it to his client to review, which often takes a few more days. When the opposing party approves the letter, the lawyer then sends it to me. No matter how quickly I respond to the settlement letter, the opposing side may then go through the same drill again. Before you know it a month has passed and relatively little progress has been made.
Of course, at least one round of settlement letters is necessary to see how far apart the two sides are. If your spouse is living in fantasy land and makes an unreasonable offer, there is no use meeting, because a settlement is highly unlikely. However, if the parties are not that far apart, then I am a strong proponent of inviting the opposing side and his/her lawyer to my office for a 4-way settlement conference. These meetings often result in a settlement far in advance of trial, saving months of stress and thousands of dollars in attorney’s fees.
These conferences can last from one to twelve hours depending on how committed the parties are to settling, how many issues are in dispute, and how much money the parties are fighting over. Keeping the clients separated in different conference rooms is almost always a must. I once had a couple almost come to blows over Christmas ornaments! If I believe that settlement is a possibility, I try to “lock the door” and not let anyone out until we have a settlement. It is also imperative to have the parties sign a comprehensive settlement agreement at the conclusion of the meeting; experience shows that if the parties leave the meeting without signing the agreement to “sleep on it”, one of the parties invariably comes down with a case of buyer’s remorse and wants to renegotiate the agreement.
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