Virginia Divorce & Custody Law

“Four-way Settlement Conferences”: Mediation Without The Mediator

A “Four-way settlement conference” is when husband and wife and their respective attorneys meet at one of the attorneys’ offices to negotiate and attempt to settle the case.  These meetings are often an excellent forum to settle a case.  

 

Nothing can waste time and a client’s money like the two attorneys going back and forth and back and forth sending settlement letters and emails.   If I send my opponent a detailed settlement letter, chances are that he will in turn mail it to his client for review.  In a few days they will then talk, and at some point the attorney will draft a counter-proposal (which could take days depending on his schedule).  He will then give it to his client to review, which often takes a few more days.  When the opposing party approves the letter, the lawyer then sends it to me.  No matter how quickly I respond to the settlement letter, the opposing side may then go through the same drill again. Before you know it a month has passed and relatively little progress has been made. 

When Will My Trial Date Be?

If you file a divorce case in the Fairfax County Circuit Court (and this certainly is not unique to Fairfax), you might be surprised to learn that your final trial date will probably be between six months and one year from now. If you have children, and you and your spouse do not agree upon custody and/or visitation, that is a painfully long time to wait. What happens during the next year? If you moved out of the marital home and your spouse will not let you see the children, or if your spouse is dictating an unacceptable visitation schedule, or if you want custody, you will want the court to order a temporary custody/visitation schedule which will last until the final trial date (known as a "Pendente Lite" Order"). Unfortunately, you probably will not get such an Order in Fairfax.

What to Bring to Your First Meeting with Your Attorney

The first hour with your attorney is often the most valuable time your Family Law attorney will spend with you. Your attorney will gather the facts of your case, identify the issues that need to be addressed immediately and those that are not as urgent but still need attention. If you provide enough documents and information about the facts in your case, your attorney should be able to give you a fair assessment of your marital estate, the approximate level of support if the facts warrant it and tell you an approximate mid point for settling or splitting the marital estate.

You Do Not Need a “Separation Agreement” To Prove That You Are Separated

You do not need a written agreement in Virginia to establish the fact that you and your spouse are separated. One of the grounds of divorce in Virginia is living separate and apart for 12 months (6 months if you do not have minor children and if you have a signed agreement fully resolving all issues arising out of your marriage). Whether or not you are separated is purely a factual issue that the court will determine. To be separated, two factors need to coincide: (1) physical separation; and (2) one of the spouses must form the intention to remain permanently living separate and apart.